What is wholeness?
It is not about having the perfect life, and it is not just for those who have never been broken. It is not something you lose and never gain back. Wholeness is about never losing our capacity for joy, even through the brokenness. In this crazy, messy life, we will always have both sides – the dark and the light. But moving through times of darkness does not mean our wholeness has disappeared.
Whenever we experience pain, sadness, or a tragedy, it’s easy to think, how will I ever feel happy or whole again? Sometimes we feel as though we’ve been irreparably damaged or have lost a part of ourselves. But I’ve discovered through my own dark times, that this is not the case. When we allow the darkness to be our teacher, we become broken open and transformed from what we once were. If we surrender to the uncomfortable feelings or grief, we release our resistance and become open to deeper wisdom and paths of healing.
Looking back at some of the most difficult times in my life, I’ve realized that all those moments of brokenness were opportunities to rediscover the wholeness that was always there. I was becoming more in tune with myself than ever before. During those times, I wanted more than anything to feel lightness and joy. That intense longing and desire eventually led me to feel pure joy again, but it did not completely erase the pain that would always live in my heart. And the thing is, I didn’t want it to.
As a result of consciously moving through my pain, I became a more compassionate person, both towards myself and others. I grew wiser to what truly matters in life. I developed a deeper connection with others, and attracted more love. By honoring and recognizing the wisdom in my sadness, I had greater appreciation for the joy that showed up. The joy and sadness will always fluctuate, but they are both valid. By honoring both sides, you are honoring your human story.
We can honor our wholeness by truly celebrating when we feel joy, living in the sweet moment, and remembering we were all meant to have it. When we feel broken, we can honor those feelings of sadness by practicing self-compassion and treating oneself with loving care. Just as joy should not be ignored, neither should the sadness. It’s communicating that something deserves to be heard and attended to. Take note of this, and nurture those feelings.
Just remember, even in times of struggle you are no less whole than at times you are completely lit up. You may just need to be with your feelings and allow them to guide you. Sometimes you need a break to restore, so that you may truly blossom into what is next. Your learning, your open-heartedness, your passion, and evolution are what make you whole. There is no perfect path to follow. But no matter what you are feeling or dealing with, remember to be kind and gentle with yourself.
Being whole is about embracing all of you, and remembering you are meant to feel joy, even amidst the hard times. Make decisions in alignment with your feelings. Surround yourself by people who make you feel good and champion your spirit. And most of all, love yourself and know that all the messy, beautiful sides of your story are what make up the wholeness inside.
Joy and peace are always there, waiting patiently within reach!